The Carrotpenis' are goin on a road trip for the extended weekend. Our exciting port of call takes us above the cheddar curtain. Yes, we are going to the Midwest Mecca of white trash, the Wisconsin Dells.
For those of you that are unfamiliar let me try and paint a picture. It's sort of like Vegas without the casinos, the strip, the strippers, the prostitutes, and the fun. Well I guess it's nothing like Vegas after all. It's sort of like the Jersey Shore without the beach and without the fucking tourists from New York City. And just so we're clear, I am talking about the Wildwood or Seaside Heights Jersey Shore not the Avalon or Long Beach Island Jersey Shore. If you've ever been, you know exactly what I am talking about. All the cheese (no insult intended towards the Wisconsin folks) and less sand.
I guess I don't know how to do it justice. It's a resort community in the middle of Wisconsin that has a bunch of really big water parks with hotels ajacent to them. Now I know what you're thinking. Why the fuck are you going there in the middle of the Winter? To remain open on an annual basis, the waterpark hotels have built indoor water parks to bring the tourists to their properties during the Winter months. For the kids, it's actually great fun, water slides and lots of splashing around. For the adults, it's a lot of pasty flesh in bathing suits, mine included, chasing the kids around.
One fantastic thing about the Dells though is that there is great "people watching". Not necessarily as good as a county fair or a trip to our local Walmart, but good just the same. I love to just sit and watch the drama unfold. The place is like a train wreck. You don't want to look but you must. I am planning on bring my digital camera with me so that I can hopefully share some of the local flavor with you after the weekend.
Wish me luck! Luckily, I also plan on bringing a bunch of bourbon. I'll do an update next week.
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