Like Fine Wine.....

Remember that girl with the plain brown hair who was in your high school classes that you never took a second look at because she was built like a boy and really didn't stand out like some of the other girls.



Well, what if she turned out to look like this as an adult. You'd probably be kicking yourself right now, wouldn't you?





Cathy Loch is that girl for me. I am probably over stating things a bit though. Cathy and I were casual friends in high school. We probably never would have dated in a million years. I was generally an immature idiot, still am in fact. She was already dating older guys. I just think that it extremely ironic. So, remember boys that nerdy girl that's really quiet, might turn out looking like this.

If you want to see some more pictures of Cathy, check out her film site at www.goldcastlefilms.com.

Have a good weekend!

Labor Day: And the Winner Is!

Words simply cannot describe what is going on between The Fat Bastard and Mrs. Jones in this picture.

In this photo, Fresh conducts a mock dramatization of his wife's crash to the patio.

Runner Up for Best Labor Day Pic!

This is one of my prouder pictures of the evening. Here caught in mid flight is Mrs. Fresh trying her hand at stage diving. Below her is the unsuspecting Mr. Fresh. This resulted in big fall right onto the brick patio and a broken toe. Remember it's all fun and games to someone gets hurt. Actually, on second thought, it's was still all fun and games even after this. Please be sure to notice Mrs. Cowboy in the background doing some sort of Saturday Night Fever manuver.

Another Labor Day Pic!

Here's a great picture of Mrs. Cowboy and Mrs. Fresh busting a move to 80's music on the picnic table.

More Labor Day Pics!

Here's a picture of Dr. Jones who foolishly told Mrs. Fresh that he didn't want another shot. Mrs. Fresh gets what she wants. You'll notice that Dr. Jones is in medical scrubs. While I am certain he's done a few breast and pelvic exams, Dr. Jones is definitely not a real doctor. I'm still not sure why he got dressed up that way. Maybe it was to mend Mrs. Fresh's broken toe when she plunged from the table.

Labor Day Pics!

Here is a picture of the Cowboy recovering from his boob rub. Boy, Mrs. Fresh must sure like you. You'll notice that the beer didn't leave his hand and was kept upright at all times.

Labor Day Pics!

As I mentioned previously, Mr. & Mrs. Fresh had a blow out Labor Day party. There was tons of drinking and good times. And like the good friend that I am I made sure that Fresh got his digital out to document the shenanigans. Our first photo is courtesy of Mrs. Fresh and Cowboy. Mrs. Fresh, stand up hostess that she is, was rubbing her boobs san bra in anyone's face who would do a shot of Captain Morgan for her. Normally, I'm a Jim Beam guy but I'm willing to take one for the team once in awhile. This photo is right after the Cowboy's turn with the Captain. This is what happens when you get some overeager boob rubbing from Mrs. Fresh. I believe this resulted in a scraped knee for the Cowboy, but I don't recall him complaining about it.

You Can Take the Boy Out of Jersey

But you can't take Jersey out of the boy.....

You Are 73% New Jersey!

You are definitely Jersey. Well done, my friend. You are most likely from this great state, and you fit right in. Odds are, you love being Jersey!

How New Jersey Are You?

You Are 72% North Jersey

Dude, you're a real North Jerseyan! As such, you've probably been down the shore this summer, shopped at Garden State, taken the PATH into the city, and gone to at least one Bon Jovi concert. However your score does leave a little room for improvement...

The Ultimate North Jersey Quiz
Create Your Own Quiz

People Are Idiots

The bank that I have my account at has a combo drive up window and drive up atm line. The bank also has 4 other drive up bank lanes. Wouldn't you know it, everytime I go to the fucking place, some dumbass is doing some obviously complicated bank transaction like cashing in their welfare check for pennies which needs to be counted one by one in the atm lane when all four other lanes are open. Use your fucking heads people!

NASCAR Weekend Pictures

As promised awhile ago here are some pics from our Nascar Trip....

Here is our redneck compound. Notice the wing back leather chairs. I spent a number of hours sleeping off the night before in those chairs.

















Another shot of the compound. I took these on the last day because I was too drunk to remember to take them any other time. The flags were much more impressive when they were flying above the trailer but I think you get the idea.

















Here is picture of our fearless leader, Mr. Clean whipping up some vittles for us the first night we were there.

















Our lounging area. Notice the $500k motorcoach just across the way.

















This pretty much says it all.

How I Spent My Summer Vacation!

Wow, it has been a busy Summer and early Fall. Work continues to be a bear. I now know why people go into their work places and kill everyone. If I hear one more complaint about the "seating chart", I am going to bring in a paintball gun and shoot everyone who has made my life hell over the past few months. I'm not sure that one gun will be enough though.

Socially, the Carrotpenis' have been really busy as well. Much of our Summer revolved around having drinks with good friends and hoping the kids weren't burning the house down while we were. The trip to NASCAR with Cowboy and friends was a great time (see post below). We also attended/hosted a bunch of impromtu, magarita happy hour parties that often turned into foolish late nights before a day of work parties. At 37, you'd think I would know better but alas I am still a certified dumbass. Mr. & Mrs. Fun thanks for organizing those events.

Had a couple wild evenings with Cowboy, his wife, my wife and other various friends. One memorable one involved the four of us running the majority of the dinner crowd out a small Italian restaurant due to our boisterous behavior at the adjacent bar. The girls ended up dancing on said bar and Cowboy's wife gave me a fabulous picture of her cleavage which can be seen above. There are also some other fun pictures that I am unable to share due to confidentiality reasons. This is of course assuming that Cowboy's wife does not blab to Mrs. Carrotpenis about any of my drunken shenanigans i.e. passing out at Nascar for 150 laps of race after overserving self at the hospitality tent, ever again. Otherwise, all bets are off.

We went to a Labor Day party at Fresh's in our old neighborhood that was great fun. The Fat Bastard was there and insisted on going out and getting the ingredients for Jager Bombs (Jagermeister & Red Bull) after everyone at the party already had plenty to drink. Then proceeded to organize the polishing off of the entire bottle of Jager in like 15 minutes. Subsequent highlights after the Jager was consumed include the following debauchery...Cowboy blacking out for the next two hours including the ride home. Fat Bastard mooning the entire party much to the chagrin of his somewhat sober wife. The tearing of Fat Bastard's shirt off by Fresh's drunk wife. Again, much to the chagrin of Fat Bastard's wife. Cowboy and Fresh's wives table dancing to 80's music on an outdoor pinic table. And finally, the unsuccessful spontaneous stage dive of Fresh's wife off of the picnic table into Fresh's unsuspecting arms; which resulted in a plunge onto the brick patio and a broken toe. Yeah, nothing like a quiet evening in the suburbs.
I will continue to update you all with the rest of my Summer fun next time. I also promise to include some more pictures.