That this may be the reason why when I have a date over to my house for dinner and drinks that the romance of whole situation quickly ends. Come on, what girl doesn't enjoy an overly affectionate 17 pound cat sitting on your lap purring while you're watching a movie. I am mostly kidding about that. Clearly, the big win during the division of assets portion of my divorce was "Precious" here. Sure, I did get to keep the 5 burner stainless steel grill but since winter has yet to end here in Chicago I'm still debating if that was a win in this situation.
Do single women give you a break for having a cat due to divorce or am I automatically labeled as "Guy with Cat"? I am surmising that the situation is not good. I've tried several times to ship said cat off to the "farm", but kids keep putting up a veiled defensive front. They claim to love the cat and hint that I will no longer be loved if cat mysteriously disappears one day. Yet, when they come over to my place Senor Hairball is largely ignored for the TV. I did notice a large hawk scoop up a rabbit in the neighbor's front yard last week. Perhaps, the cat and I need to start enjoying some outdoor activities together. That said, it's going to take a pretty big hawk to get his giant ass off the ground. Perhaps, there's a gang of hawks in the neighborhood to take him on.
2 comments:
A wise man named Dan Cable once told me: "P*ssy begets p*ssy."
My good friend Jasper won the cat in the divorce too! His cat is also overly affectionate--I don't think it helps him get laid but women do seem to have pity when he explains that he wanted the dog but the wife wouldn't give it to him.
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