Ugh!!! What was I thinking...

I am seriously starting to rethink this volunteering for VBS gig that I've gotten myself into this week. That's Vacation Bible School for those of you not in the know. This is week one of three weeks with the kids all to myself this summer. I love being able to spend some quality one on one time with them. Them not living with me 24/7 is easily the worst part of the whole divorce. As such, they are participating in VBS at our church. The Girl is in the drama and helping out with pre-k gym. The Boy is being just that a boy along with other shamefully awkward 10 year old boys being taught to dance and sing to christian rocks songs. And he's further hindered by the fact that he clear got his sense of rhythm from me. Can anyone say "white man's overbite"?

Anyway, because I either wanted to spend more time with them (my kids that is) or I am making up for my sins of the past year, I volunteered to work at VBS for the entire week. I figured how hard could it be anyway. You have cute kids and their hot moms hanging out out in the sun for an entire week. Well I better have locked up my spot in heaven because I clearly drew a bad card here. Am I hanging out with the hot moms playing with silly string and eating snacks on my 45 minute break. No, I am running the song lyrics on Powerpoint for the entire time without even hardly a bathroom break while they teach song and dance moves to various age groups. This means I have to listen to the same 4 or 5 songs played in little snippets and parts for 3 hours straight with little or no downtime. If I have to hear that fucking "Power" song one more time, I may strangle that little lightning bolt character they're using as a mascot. The other one that make me want to slit my wrists is written to the tune of the "Banana Boat" song but with a religious theme. It also doesn't help that I drink about 25 cups of coffee to keep myself from falling asleep while I do it. So, I am not only exhausted but also very jittery to boot from all of the caffeine.

The only people that possibly have it worse than me are the group who have to actually sing and play the songs. At least what they are doing takes talent and skill. I am just at button pusher and not even a very good one at that. Being slightly ADD, the moment I look away from the screen I lose track of where we are in the song and have do a major scan of the song to see if I am just one page off or ten. It's like a firedrill every time I do it. Well, at least the kids are having fun. Sure, they get to jump, sing and dance. Plus, they only listen to the songs like four times not four hundred. Dear Lord, please give me the patience to make it through the next three days.