100 Things About Me!

For awhile I've been putting off putting up a 100 Things About Me list, because I thought they were sort of queer (for clarification in an stupid way, not in a gay way). Then I realized I was addicted to reading them on other blogs so I thought I'd give one a shot.

1. I am married.
2. I have two kids.
3. The Girl is almost ten.
4. The Boy is almost seven.
5. Boy am I getting fucking old.
6. We have a dog that annoys the shit out of me.
7. But I like our cat even less.
8. We live in a suburb north of Chicago.
9. I am rapidly going gray.
10. I blame it on 1-7.
11. I'd like to lose 10 pounds
12. Okay, 20 pounds
13. I normally drink straight liquor on the rocks.
14. Scotch used to be my favorite.
15. But now I like Bourbon
16. Basil Hayden's is my preference of late.
17. My eyes are a bright blue color.
18. I am addicted to my Blackberry and ofter refer to is as the Crackberry.
19. If I am watching TV, everything else in the room ceases to exist.
20. It drives my wife nuts.
21. I attended Penn State University, but did not graduate from there.
22. I tell people that I honed my social skills while I was there.
23. I love Penn State Football.
24. And I think that Joe Paterno can die on the field if he wants to.
25. I was in a fraternity.
26. I learned a lot of good things there.
27. And learned a lot from the the bad things.
28. I have a tatoo on my ankle.
29. My left ear looks like it's pierced.
30. But I haven't had an earring in it for over 10 years.
31. I have very few friends I consider close.
32. Yet, I have many casual friends.
33. I finished up my degree going to night school at Domican University in River Forest, IL.
34. I like power boating.
35. And go wakeboarding whenever I can.
36. I think belly button piercings are hot.
37. I think nose piercings are even hotter.
38. I see nothing wrong with a woman's nipples poking through her shirt.
39. In fact, I like it.
40. I am very organized at work.
41. But very disorganized at home.
42. This too, drives my wife crazy.
43. I prefer to take the train to work.
44. I detest driving there.
45. I am much crabbier at home and work if I am driving.
46. I am very intolerant of stupid people.
47. I have a hard time not lettting them know this.
48. I deal with a lot of stupid people at work; you do the math.
49. I am embarrassed for women that take their clothes off for a living.
50. I excel at games where you can hold a beer in your hand while playing.
51. Quoits is my best.
52. Darts and shuffleboard are a close second.
53. I believe in God.
54. But hate when other people try to get me to believe in theirs.
55. People that don't know me can think that I am conceited.
56. That's mostly not true.
57. I procrastinate whenever possible.
58. I've discovered that in corporate America this isn't always a bad thing.
59. Corn Nuts give me horrible gas.
60. I am forbidden to eat them.
61. I grew up in a really small town in New Jersey.
62. I worked as a bartender at three different Chi-Chi's restaurants.
63. Working in restaurants prepared me to work in corporate America a lot more than I thought.
64. I can hold a conversation with just about anyone on any subject for at least a few minutes.
65. I am pretty good at crossword puzzles.
66. And can play a mean game of Trivial Pursuit
67. I attribute all three to reading anything I could lay my hands on as a child
68. I am horrible dancer with little to no rhythm.
69. When I go out with my friends, my wife instructs them not to let me dance under penalty of death.
70. The point where I will do karaoke and the point where I will pass out from drinking are roughly the same.
71. I love going to Wrigley to watch the Cubs.
72. Regardless of how bad they are.
73. I enjoy watching movies.
74. But rarely go to see them at the theatre.
75. I have an unexplainable hatred for Celine Dion.
76. Just looking at her makes my skin crawl.
77. I quit smoking a few years ago.
78. But still love to catch one on the sly once in awhile.
79. I make concrete judgements about people a few seconds after I meet someone.
80. I am rarely wrong about them.
81. I think that Tivo is a fantastic invention.
82. I rarely watch live TV now.
83. This saves me hours and hours of time each week.
84. I like to read novels.
85. But only do so sporadically.
86. Right now, I prefer books about business.
87. My wife and I met at Penn State.
88. At a bar called Zeno's.
89. My original date for the evening spilled beer on her.
90. We tell our kids it was a restaurant and there's no mention of a beer spill in our story.
91. It sounds much more romantic that way.
92. I have a very sarcastic sense of humor.
93. Not everyone appreciates it.
94. I don't care all that much.
95. I enjoy traveling for both work and pleasure.
96. But rarely do either.
97. I love spending time with my kids.
98. But often need to go back to work to rest from it.
99. My last name sounds like Carrotpenis!
100. I used to hate it but now I think it's kinda funny.